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Role-Model

07 Jun

My extended family has about a 100 Chartered Accountants (the CPA equivalent, for the Americans among us), including my dad, so somehow I always knew that’s what I wanted to be. A couple of years ago, a distant cousin came upto me at a wedding and said “You are my role-model”. For a second there I was thrown and looked around the room. When I realised she was talking to me, I preened a little, because I thought she was referring to my figure (by some miracle my mom had helped me achieve a figure that was better than my pre-baby one, 6 weeks after delivery!). Then she gushed “You are the first girl C.A. in our family and I intend to be the second” and sighed. Yes, we have women who are doctors, engineers, entrepreneurs and lots of other high-flying stuff in our family, however not one women CA!

Over the next two years when I felt particularly low – physically (I put on 20 pounds post-business), emotionally (working with your husband has it’s downsides) or careerwise (I can’t begin to tell you how I messed up) – I would cheer myself up by reliving those few moments when I was a role- MODEL (get the emphasis).

Well, this last week I was at a family friend’s wedding when I met a girl, let’s call her A, who I used to babysit for in school. 10 years down the line she was still super cute and friendly. This is the conversation we had:

A’s mom: A’s always talking about you and how you’re her role-model

A: I just finished my CPA and post graduation in accounting. I’m starting with E&Y next month, just like you (I did my articleship with E&Y, ages back). I want to be just like you. Have a career, gorgeous husband and cute babies. I’m going to come to you for tips.

Me (with the rapidly swelling head): You’re too sweet, I’m sure you’ll do better than me. Call me anytime, I’d love to help out.

A: Thanks N. Oh! by the way when did you get so fat?! You still look really pretty though.

The instant fall from cloud 9 to ground 0 was quick and unexpected. Pride does (literally) come before a fall. Fortunately, I knew this girl since she was a toddler and really didn’t really feel too bad. My role-(non) model head did immediately deflate and I was back to my old humble self.

Your Thoughts:

Have you ever been in a similar Pride to Fall situation? Or are you mature enough to take the good and the bad with your equilibrium intact?

 

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5 Comments

Posted by on June 7, 2011 in Role Models, The Real Me

 

Tags: , ,

5 responses to “Role-Model

  1. speedsere

    June 11, 2011 at 1:53 am

    ick, I meant here for hear and perceived for percieved, you knew that 🙂

     
  2. speedsere

    June 11, 2011 at 1:49 am

    Ugh, you’ve witness THAT situation with me, and that too just four months post partum. So you know the deal 🙂
    I was annoyed but I think I handled it ok at the time because I was just too shocked to hear AND digest being called fat/chubby. Hear I was trying to nourish my baby and breastfeed and heal myself at the sametime. In my case, it wasn’t even a pride to fall, just fall.

    Today, generally speaking, I consider such a statement very offensive and somewhat oppressive because if that person who has been commented upon doesn’t have it in them to handle such a FAT comment, will definitely quite likely develope issues with food. So being cognizant and mature are only some basic steps to preventing eating disorders esp. in kids, teens and young adults. You mention that you know the girl — and didn’t take it too seriously, good for you for having your head on your shoulders. My story: I was an easy target for being “fat” while in school and it greatly affected my self esteem. Naturally, the effects can easily spill into other areas in your life. It took some work on my part to revisit my attitude towards how I am percieved and the endless comments on weight gain/loss (although most people mean well). I can tell that it can be frustrating when you are constantly reminded what you were and exhilirating when they tell you how far you’ve come — I have mixed emotions depending on how people acknowledge my figure 🙂 Thankfully, I no longer hold any resentment and am comfortable talking about weight “issues”, but I rather talk about the weather or what is new and going well in the world, depending on who it is I am talking to.

     
  3. Sanjana

    June 8, 2011 at 2:26 am

    u’re not fat! so ignore that girl!

    And aww! Thanks babe!

    *hugs*

    (and yeah, I’m not satc girl, i’d probably be NO SITC :P)

     
  4. Sanjana

    June 7, 2011 at 8:59 pm

    aw! Must be the best feeling! :o)

    I’m sadly the black sheep on the family (cos I’m still unmarried) and no one will use me as a role-model! :\

     
    • nmaha

      June 7, 2011 at 9:24 pm

      wouldn’t call it the best, especially after she called me ‘fat’ (so not PC)

      I would have loved a role-model like you when I was a kid. Someone to tell me that women have a right to live life on their own terms. You are my real SATC girl (and yes, I am obsessed with SATC, not for the guys but for the friendships).

       

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